Good Mentorship Is Small Business GPS

WHAT MAKES A 'GOOD' MENTOR?

Mentorship is a concept that is often discussed but not always well-defined. When I worked as a business consultant at the SBDC, plenty of clients called me their mentor or coach, when truly I was neither. For me to consider myself such, I would have needed to take the role that I did on my own and not as a condition of my job. Granted, I understand why they said this. I had the traits of a good mentor:

• Relevant experience and expertise

• Strong communication and interpersonal skills

• Commitment and availability

• Trust and confidentiality

• Willingness to challenge and push the mentee

One of the traits that I think really made an impression on my former clients was my willingness to challenge and push them. However, the moment I challenged them was the usually the defining moment in the relationship. Some loved this. Others did not. Nonetheless, I realized that my traits of a mentor (more than anything) caused my former clients to look to me for direction, feedback and constructive criticism. Like a GPS.

Relevant Experience and Expertise

This point is a bit of a no-brainer but it is quite important. Though it can be helpful to have a mentor with general knowledge of what you do, nothing can compare to having specific knowledge and experience. It is the difference between incremental and exponential growth. Not only does this help you to make better choices, it can also create opportunities for you in that field or industry. Whether those opportunities come from your mentor connecting you with a colleague or working with you directly, either way your chances of more impactful success are greatly increased. This is because they are in the same boat as you and not spectating from the shore.

Strong COmmunication and Interpersonal Skills

You are going to need a mentor that will be clear and direct with you to minimize any misunderstandings. Though there may need to be more nuance at times, both of you should be comfortable with asking questions and also having uncomfortable conversations. Mentorship is a relationship ultimately and all the foundational rules still apply. Neither should have trouble with following-up, having conversations and meeting face-to-face when necessary. The reason that I did not fully consider myself a mentor to my former clients is because that was my job. So, I put some limits on communication to preserve a work/life balance that I probably would not outside of work conditions. Outside of work conditions I would want to meet with a mentee just to talk, catch up and see how I could help them. It makes a huge difference for me.

COmmitment and Availability

Along similar lines, mentors should be committed to help you and also available to do so. However, it's not a one-way street. You must also be committed to accept and apply said help as well as make yourself available to do what it takes to carry that out. Beware of someone who claims to want to mentor you but is impossible to reach and connect with or makes promises to help but never follows through. A good mentor understands the value of the help they offer and would never want to withhold that from someone who is navigating the terrain they traversed, perhaps without a mentor. In turn, a good mentee would appreciate a mentor that is committed and available because they understand the time and guesswork they save through the relationship.

Trust and Confidentiality

Trust is necessary for healthy relationships. The relationship between mentor and mentee should be building trust consistently through their communication, commitment, availability and interpersonal encounters. Keeping their communications confidential also helps. This creates a safe space for both to be honest, vulnerable and transparent. Each party will be much more comfortable in the relationship this way which makes it easier to work together as partners, if the opportunity presents itself.

Willingness to Challenge and Push the Mentee

Again, probably my favorite trait of a good mentor. It's likely the coach in me that I have been for as long as I can remember but I have always seen the world through the lens of continuous improvement (kaizen). For years, I was saddened by other people not living up to their greatest potential because I always saw it. Eventually, I learned to focus on my own development and to refrain from giving unsolicited encouragement to greater heights. However, the SBDC consulting job gave me permission to offer that encouragement to clients who were seeking that level of feedback and accountability. It was something that I learned a lot from but is now reserved for paying clients and friends who ask. At the end of the day, a good mentor will want to help you to break through your fears, assumptions and comfort zones. You will never regret the challenge and push beyond those barriers.

I was inspired to write this, in part, because I found a very good mentor and am very grateful that we connected. The irony is that they were a former client but we did not work together very long. Eventually, we were able to build a professional relationship over about two years and also a friendship. The traits are ever-present and we have been able to offer opportunities to one another. This mentor reminds me of why I have also been able to be a good mentor to others over the years. It has come full circle as I continue to offer services for accountability, consulting and coaching with Intentional Professionals. Feel free to contact us for a Strategic Consultation today.

Sincerely,

-M